While reviewing bills recently I noticed my monthly cell phone bill had increased by $18. I searched the statement looking for a reason for the increase but found none.

I’m not a parsimonious old coot, but I am frugal and I was upset by an unannounced increase in the bill with no explanation for the increase. I found the provider’s phone number and decided to call for customer assistance.

“Upset” probably isn’t an accurate description of my mood at the time. I was ticked off. This big corporation was sticking it to me. I was ready to share my irritation with someone.

Then I remembered all the angry people I had to deal with during my working years. They were seething the moment I asked how I could help them and held on to that anger for the entire visit. I don’t want to be that way.

“Be kind,” I thought to myself as I “dialed” the customer service phone number. The “push one” hassle required to get through to a human tested my desire to be kind but I held to my intent.

When a woman asked how she could help, I explained clearly and kindly that I had noticed an $18 dollar increase on my monthly bill and wondered why. The woman politely told me she didn’t know why but she would try to find out.

I appreciated her frank response and told her so. Then I waited.

A few minutes later she came back online and told me she had discovered the overcharge was a mistake on her company’s part and that it had been eliminated.

After apologizing for the error, she tried to upsell me on a few additional services. I explained that my wife and I are retired and really had no need for those features.

Then the woman asked, “May I ask for how long you have been retired?’ I told her I had been retired for 11 years.

She said nothing for a few seconds and then in a softer tone she said, “I think there’s a reason you called me today.”

My smart aleck mind thought, “Yeah, I called you because I’m a tightwad and didn’t like that $18 over charge.” However, I was still trying to be kind so I asked, “Why do you say that?”

The customer service representative explained that this day was the five-month anniversary of her father’s passing and my having been retired for 11 years helped her assume I was about the same age as her father.

She said, “I am having a difficult time with the loss of my dad and it was so good to visit with someone his age who was kind to me today.”

We talked about losing someone we loved and handling grief. She said that it’s been five months and she is still crying frequently. I confessed that I lost my wife 12 years ago and that this big ol’ 6’7″ guy still cries over her passing. Shakespeare wrote, I told her, that grief expressed is grief relieved.

She thanked me for chatting with her and for being kind to her. I wished her well. Then she added, “Would you do me a favor?” I assured her I would try.

“Please send a text or email to your children today and tell them you love them. I would so much like to receive a note from my daddy today telling me he loved me.”

After I hung up I realized anew that the simple act of being kind can make a difference in someone’s life. The old adage is true: Be kind; everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.

Thinking back to childhood, my mother used to scold me for my big mouth. It was unkind, she said. When she was really upset with me she called me a “beck stük;” that’s a Low German-speaking mother’s way of saying “mouth piece.”

I do have a big mouth and I’m not afraid to use it. Having spent a portion of my career in sales I learned to be tactful. I found that a kind and pleasant attitude is a key asset for a salesman.

I felt good the rest of that day, knowing I had helped someone going through a difficult time.

Before I did anything else that morning I wrote an email to both of my children telling them about my phone call and adding that I loved them with all my heart.

They responded graciously but probably wondered what Dad had been up to that day.

Arvid Huisman can be contacted at huismaniowa@gmail.com. ©2025 by Huisman Communications.